This is a hard post for me to make, I have been really down the last few weeks. I mean really down, words cannot describe it. I know I have been beyond silly on a few posts and argumentative at times, as others have been too, but this is from the
bottom of my heart and a lot of stuff here is hard to say. Why am I doing this? Not for sympathy, not for attention, but there are a few things I need to say, it is therapeutic for me to say them and maybe something here will inspire you. And I am
doing this across the board with many in my life, some folks important, some not as important. Right now, I have a lot of time on my hands.

I always thought of myself as being invinceable, I think a lot of us do, but I have had some recent health issues that have been beyond scary to me. I have not worked since Thanksgiving week and probably will not return for another month. I am on
disability for the first time in my life. I have been scared and deeply depressed. I have had several panic attacks. If you never had one, well just imagine waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, heart pounding, and you feel like all
is lost and hopeless. Thank goodness my wife was there to calm me down. This is all new to me, not really an anxious or panicky kind of person. I feel better now, no more of these episodes the last few days, they are scary and brutal. I have never
been to so many doctors, and never had so many tests done, this has all been eye opening. I will be ok with time, but in all honesty, have NEVER been so afraid, at some points almost a debilitating afraid.

Being away from work and being idle a lot, I have had time to reflect on a few things. First, I realized my own mortality, and really what a short time we have here. So many people close to us have died recently. Some it was expected, some it was not.
Every day really is a blessing, talking to a friend the other day, he said that "We are all time bombs". That time bomb could be cancer, a stroke, a heart attack, a car wreck, being hit by lightening, it could be anything. You really never know what
is waiting around the corner for any of us. Made me really appreciate every day I can wake up and still be alive and with my faculties intact. I have pondered what awaits us when we are no longer alive. Is there an afterlife, or is that just wishful
thinking? Or is it just nothing, absolutely nothing. Well, none of us know the answer to that, and the more I think about it, the more anxious I get. Because there is no answer. I have realized how fragile our existence is, and the little control we
do have over things.

With all this time to reflect, I realize that I have generally been a good person in this life, but flawed in many ways like all of us. I have generally been kind and caring, but at times not so much. I keep so busy, I mean really busy, it masks a lot
of underlying depression I have, and I have come to grips with it. I had an awful upbringing, and a fair amount of hurt and disappointment in my life, and maybe did not process it as well as I should. I think we all have some degrees of mental health
issues, I am going to deal with them in 2023, with the goal of being more relaxed and kinder to myself, and kinder, more caring, and more empathetic toward others like never before.

I am lucky to be married to an amazing lady. We will be together 29 years next month. I think overall i have been a good spouse, and she has been wonderful helping me navigate these health issues I have had to deal with. The love, kindness, and
support has been amazing. Whatever I need, she is there. I have long taken this woman for granted, and maybe to some extent she has taken me for granted. I feel terrible about this, if I lost her I would be forever lost. It should not take a health
crisis or really any kind of crisis for you to realize the amazing person you are married to, or the amazing friends or significant other you have, you should treat them beyond special every day you wake up. Never take them for granted, being sick I
have had time to reflect on this and am truly ashamed that I have taken others in my life for granted. My message here is I am sure you all have special people in your life. Do not wait for sickness or God forbid tragedy to bring you closer, every day
tell them how much you care for them, how special they are, and make them feel like they are the most important person in the world to you, because they really are.

We have had some rather bitter exchanges here, and for those I am deeply sorry. Especially about politics. I can't tell you how many relationships I have seen destroyed the last few years over politics and Covid. I left Facebook, tired of the
arguments and insults among people that used to get along so well. I have family, maybe some of you do too, that are blood and have tarnished relationships because of politics. What has sunk in with me is that both sides are equally bad. There are a few
truly passionate and honest politicians I am sure, but for the most part they do not report to us, they do not work for us, they work for others in much higher places. We are all just little people, we would like to think we are important, we are not.
And no matter how pursuasive your argument and proof you provide, you are not going to change most people glued to the left or glued to the right. Truth be it, we are probably both wrong, we are all getting screwed no matter what side of the aisle we
identify with. They want us devisive and fighting, and we feed right into it. And what comes of it in the end, except arguments, exchanging insults, broken relationships and even sometimes violence and destruction of property.

I guess my message here is to take a deep breath with the New Year upon us, This is probably the deepest breath I have even taken. Realize what a gift it is to be alive, and what a gift it is to have your health. Not let little things break us apart,
and build relationships and trust instead of doing the opposite. This is a very small community, very small. We are all smart decent people I am sure, although our online behavior does not always reflect it. Giving the fragility of life, given the
fragility really for this world, I hope that this small community can be a better place going forward. I hope that people in this country and others can wake up and stop being so devisive and tribal, we need to get along and work together and love each
other. That is idealistic I know, but more deviseness is the last thing we need. I doubt I will be participating much here going forward, I really need to focus on my physical and mental health and be better than ever to others important in my life.

Please accept my heartfelt wishes to all of you for a great 2023. I truly wish all of you the best. Thanks for listening, a long post, I could not be more sincere and truly wish all of you nothing but joy, happiness, and health as we embark on a new
year.

--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)

On Saturday, December 31, 2022 at 8:51:47 AM UTC-8, Irving S wrote:

This is a hard post for me to make, I have been really down the last few weeks. I mean really down, words cannot describe it. I know I have been beyond silly on a few posts and argumentative at times, as others have been too, but this is from the

bottom of my heart and a lot of stuff here is hard to say. Why am I doing this? Not for sympathy, not for attention, but there are a few things I need to say, it is therapeutic for me to say them and maybe something here will inspire you. And I am doing
this across the board with many in my life, some folks important, some not as important. Right now, I have a lot of time on my hands.

I always thought of myself as being invinceable, I think a lot of us do, but I have had some recent health issues that have been beyond scary to me. I have not worked since Thanksgiving week and probably will not return for another month. I am on

disability for the first time in my life. I have been scared and deeply depressed. I have had several panic attacks. If you never had one, well just imagine waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, heart pounding, and you feel like all is
lost and hopeless. Thank goodness my wife was there to calm me down. This is all new to me, not really an anxious or panicky kind of person. I feel better now, no more of these episodes the last few days, they are scary and brutal. I have never been to
so many doctors, and never had so many tests done, this has all been eye opening. I will be ok with time, but in all honesty, have NEVER been so afraid, at some points almost a debilitating afraid.

Being away from work and being idle a lot, I have had time to reflect on a few things. First, I realized my own mortality, and really what a short time we have here. So many people close to us have died recently. Some it was expected, some it was not.

Every day really is a blessing, talking to a friend the other day, he said that "We are all time bombs". That time bomb could be cancer, a stroke, a heart attack, a car wreck, being hit by lightening, it could be anything. You really never know what is
waiting around the corner for any of us. Made me really appreciate every day I can wake up and still be alive and with my faculties intact. I have pondered what awaits us when we are no longer alive. Is there an afterlife, or is that just wishful
thinking? Or is it just nothing, absolutely nothing. Well, none of us know the answer to that, and the more I think about it, the more anxious I get. Because there is no answer. I have realized how fragile our existence is, and the little control we do
have over things.

With all this time to reflect, I realize that I have generally been a good person in this life, but flawed in many ways like all of us. I have generally been kind and caring, but at times not so much. I keep so busy, I mean really busy, it masks a lot

of underlying depression I have, and I have come to grips with it. I had an awful upbringing, and a fair amount of hurt and disappointment in my life, and maybe did not process it as well as I should. I think we all have some degrees of mental health
issues, I am going to deal with them in 2023, with the goal of being more relaxed and kinder to myself, and kinder, more caring, and more empathetic toward others like never before.

I am lucky to be married to an amazing lady. We will be together 29 years next month. I think overall i have been a good spouse, and she has been wonderful helping me navigate these health issues I have had to deal with. The love, kindness, and support

has been amazing. Whatever I need, she is there. I have long taken this woman for granted, and maybe to some extent she has taken me for granted. I feel terrible about this, if I lost her I would be forever lost. It should not take a health crisis or
really any kind of crisis for you to realize the amazing person you are married to, or the amazing friends or significant other you have, you should treat them beyond special every day you wake up. Never take them for granted, being sick I have had time
to reflect on this and am truly ashamed that I have taken others in my life for granted. My message here is I am sure you all have special people in your life. Do not wait for sickness or God forbid tragedy to bring you closer, every day tell them how
much you care for them, how special they are, and make them feel like they are the most important person in the world to you, because they really are.

We have had some rather bitter exchanges here, and for those I am deeply sorry. Especially about politics. I can't tell you how many relationships I have seen destroyed the last few years over politics and Covid. I left Facebook, tired of the arguments

and insults among people that used to get along so well. I have family, maybe some of you do too, that are blood and have tarnished relationships because of politics. What has sunk in with me is that both sides are equally bad. There are a few truly
passionate and honest politicians I am sure, but for the most part they do not report to us, they do not work for us, they work for others in much higher places. We are all just little people, we would like to think we are important, we are not. And no
matter how pursuasive your argument and proof you provide, you are not going to change most people glued to the left or glued to the right. Truth be it, we are probably both wrong, we are all getting screwed no matter what side of the aisle we identify
with. They want us devisive and fighting, and we feed right into it. And what comes of it in the end, except arguments, exchanging insults, broken relationships and even sometimes violence and destruction of property.

I guess my message here is to take a deep breath with the New Year upon us, This is probably the deepest breath I have even taken. Realize what a gift it is to be alive, and what a gift it is to have your health. Not let little things break us apart,

and build relationships and trust instead of doing the opposite. This is a very small community, very small. We are all smart decent people I am sure, although our online behavior does not always reflect it. Giving the fragility of life, given the
fragility really for this world, I hope that this small community can be a better place going forward. I hope that people in this country and others can wake up and stop being so devisive and tribal, we need to get along and work together and love each
other. That is idealistic I know, but more deviseness is the last thing we need. I doubt I will be participating much here going forward, I really need to focus on my physical and mental health and be better than ever to others important in my life.

Please accept my heartfelt wishes to all of you for a great 2023. I truly wish all of you the best. Thanks for listening, a long post, I could not be more sincere and truly wish all of you nothing but joy, happiness, and health as we embark on a new

year.

Hi Irving,

I tried sending you a private email, but your old email address has been deactivated. Send me another email if you want to talk privately.

Tom

--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)

On Saturday, January 7, 2023 at 10:30:49 PM UTC-5, Tommy wrote:

On Saturday, December 31, 2022 at 8:51:47 AM UTC-8, Irving S wrote:

This is a hard post for me to make, I have been really down the last few weeks. I mean really down, words cannot describe it. I know I have been beyond silly on a few posts and argumentative at times, as others have been too, but this is from the

bottom of my heart and a lot of stuff here is hard to say. Why am I doing this? Not for sympathy, not for attention, but there are a few things I need to say, it is therapeutic for me to say them and maybe something here will inspire you. And I am doing
this across the board with many in my life, some folks important, some not as important. Right now, I have a lot of time on my hands.

I always thought of myself as being invinceable, I think a lot of us do, but I have had some recent health issues that have been beyond scary to me. I have not worked since Thanksgiving week and probably will not return for another month. I am on

disability for the first time in my life. I have been scared and deeply depressed. I have had several panic attacks. If you never had one, well just imagine waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, heart pounding, and you feel like all is
lost and hopeless. Thank goodness my wife was there to calm me down. This is all new to me, not really an anxious or panicky kind of person. I feel better now, no more of these episodes the last few days, they are scary and brutal. I have never been to
so many doctors, and never had so many tests done, this has all been eye opening. I will be ok with time, but in all honesty, have NEVER been so afraid, at some points almost a debilitating afraid.

Being away from work and being idle a lot, I have had time to reflect on a few things. First, I realized my own mortality, and really what a short time we have here. So many people close to us have died recently. Some it was expected, some it was not.

Every day really is a blessing, talking to a friend the other day, he said that "We are all time bombs". That time bomb could be cancer, a stroke, a heart attack, a car wreck, being hit by lightening, it could be anything. You really never know what is
waiting around the corner for any of us. Made me really appreciate every day I can wake up and still be alive and with my faculties intact. I have pondered what awaits us when we are no longer alive. Is there an afterlife, or is that just wishful
thinking? Or is it just nothing, absolutely nothing. Well, none of us know the answer to that, and the more I think about it, the more anxious I get. Because there is no answer. I have realized how fragile our existence is, and the little control we do
have over things.

With all this time to reflect, I realize that I have generally been a good person in this life, but flawed in many ways like all of us. I have generally been kind and caring, but at times not so much. I keep so busy, I mean really busy, it masks a

lot of underlying depression I have, and I have come to grips with it. I had an awful upbringing, and a fair amount of hurt and disappointment in my life, and maybe did not process it as well as I should. I think we all have some degrees of mental health
issues, I am going to deal with them in 2023, with the goal of being more relaxed and kinder to myself, and kinder, more caring, and more empathetic toward others like never before.

I am lucky to be married to an amazing lady. We will be together 29 years next month. I think overall i have been a good spouse, and she has been wonderful helping me navigate these health issues I have had to deal with. The love, kindness, and

support has been amazing. Whatever I need, she is there. I have long taken this woman for granted, and maybe to some extent she has taken me for granted. I feel terrible about this, if I lost her I would be forever lost. It should not take a health
crisis or really any kind of crisis for you to realize the amazing person you are married to, or the amazing friends or significant other you have, you should treat them beyond special every day you wake up. Never take them for granted, being sick I have
had time to reflect on this and am truly ashamed that I have taken others in my life for granted. My message here is I am sure you all have special people in your life. Do not wait for sickness or God forbid tragedy to bring you closer, every day tell
them how much you care for them, how special they are, and make them feel like they are the most important person in the world to you, because they really are.

We have had some rather bitter exchanges here, and for those I am deeply sorry. Especially about politics. I can't tell you how many relationships I have seen destroyed the last few years over politics and Covid. I left Facebook, tired of the

arguments and insults among people that used to get along so well. I have family, maybe some of you do too, that are blood and have tarnished relationships because of politics. What has sunk in with me is that both sides are equally bad. There are a few
truly passionate and honest politicians I am sure, but for the most part they do not report to us, they do not work for us, they work for others in much higher places. We are all just little people, we would like to think we are important, we are not.
And no matter how pursuasive your argument and proof you provide, you are not going to change most people glued to the left or glued to the right. Truth be it, we are probably both wrong, we are all getting screwed no matter what side of the aisle we
identify with. They want us devisive and fighting, and we feed right into it. And what comes of it in the end, except arguments, exchanging insults, broken relationships and even sometimes violence and destruction of property.

I guess my message here is to take a deep breath with the New Year upon us, This is probably the deepest breath I have even taken. Realize what a gift it is to be alive, and what a gift it is to have your health. Not let little things break us apart,

and build relationships and trust instead of doing the opposite. This is a very small community, very small. We are all smart decent people I am sure, although our online behavior does not always reflect it. Giving the fragility of life, given the
fragility really for this world, I hope that this small community can be a better place going forward. I hope that people in this country and others can wake up and stop being so devisive and tribal, we need to get along and work together and love each
other. That is idealistic I know, but more deviseness is the last thing we need. I doubt I will be participating much here going forward, I really need to focus on my physical and mental health and be better than ever to others important in my life.

Please accept my heartfelt wishes to all of you for a great 2023. I truly wish all of you the best. Thanks for listening, a long post, I could not be more sincere and truly wish all of you nothing but joy, happiness, and health as we embark on a new

year.

Hi Irving,

I tried sending you a private email, but your old email address has been deactivated. Send me another email if you want to talk privately.

Tom

I am sorry for that. I seem to have lost your email, if you want to give me an address we can talk privately.

I can tell you that life has not been good for me of late, and I am a very different person that even a few months ago. I needed some surgery almost out of the blue, and had to go through some pre-surgical testing, and other things came out, and it has
just been one thing after another. I have lost 17 lbs in the last month, I am on some medicine that I hate, and my spirits have been beyond bleak. I never thought i would miss work and my co-workers so much. I have lost more than a bounce to my
step, physically and mentally. I really don't want to share any more than that, but it has not been a fun time and I would not wish it on anyone. I am only sharing this because these bad times have facilitated some incredible growth and revellation of
some things for me, and maybe this can help others.

As I mentioned, with so much time on my hands just to sit and ponder, I truly have realized the fragility of our existence. So much sickness and death around me. One of our good friends recently passed after a 2 year bout with pancreatic cancer, we
actually thought she had it beat. My sister in law is in hospice, with pulmonary fibrosis, and my brother in law, is now in a nursing home, he has Parkinson's and cannot stop falling. My best friend developed sepsis, ended up in ICU and vented twice,
almost died. He made it out, thank goodness. Maybe the worst story of all, a former co-worker of my wife is vacuumiing her car at a car wash, a drunk goes off the road and hits her. She is just cleaning her car, minding her own business, and this
happens out of the blue. A miracle, she survived, but many broken bones, surgeries, and months of rehab. You sit back, you see others sick and dying, then you realize it could be you, and wow it is like a ton of bricks. You realize how insignificant
most things we obsess about really are, and how each day is really a blessing. I am not the same person by a long shot. I have no idea how much longer I will walk this earth, but I can tell you all the good in me has come out stronger than ever, and
all the bad has been recognized and I will work harder than ever to be even a better person to family, friends, neighbors, etc.

I will put my chips on the table and honestly say I had some really negative thoughts about myself, but could never carry them out. That is not a solution, and the hurt to others, I could not imagine. I have accepted that good heath is not a
guarantee, but how we process health issues can affect outcomes, so I am now working to be positive. I am lucky to have family and friends that are so supportive. I have come to realize that very sadly, there must be many people out there with hosts
of phyiscal and psychological issues, that are isolated and have no one, no support system at all. how hard that must be. What a world it would be if we took time out of our busy days to help such people. One thing I will do when I am better, there is
an assisted living facility nearby. I bet there are a lot of lonely people there, that could just use a friendly face to chat with, play a game, or enjoy a cup of coffee. I am going to volunteer there, and maybe try to add a bit of joy to someone's day.
I can't tell you how good that would make me feel. It is a shame that it took having issues myself to understand all this, but we get caught up in our lives and stay so busy, we just stay centered on ourselves, that is not necessarily a bad thing, it
just is the way it is.

We come to these forums, we go back and forth, we all try to posture and make ourselves be right and the others wrong, we exchange insults, we act like idiots at times, for what? In the end, these issues are totally unimportant, and all this posturing
is unimportant. It is meaningless. The only thing that matters to me going forward is being a positive person, spreading joy to those important in my life. Being right and coming on top of arguments whether it be on line or in person means nothing in
the end, there are so many better uses of our time. Pride is not a good thing, we work so hard it seems at times to protect our egos. In the end, yes it is meaningless. Take that same energy and just spread good thoughts, and try to comfort those
who have bad thoughts.

Sorry if I rambled on, it is certainly good for me to say all these things, and I have shared these feelings with friends and family. Growth comes from good times, but also from bad times. That is really my message here, . we hope for the best in our
lives, and the same for our friends and loved ones, but sometimes things just don't go the way we hope. Be there for people, really be there. You might think you don't have the time, oh yes you do. Sadly, it could be you in that same place a month
from now, a year from now, a decade from now. If it was not for my support system, I would be in a far darker place than I am now. Really put in perspective what is important, and realize how much time we spend obsessing about trivial things and things
we absolutely cannot control. Focus on what you can control. Try to give 90% to others, and expect 10% back, what a world it would be if we all embraced that. It took some really tough times for me to understand this, but I will endeavor to spend
every remaining breathing day I have living with this concept. Easier said than done, for sure.

Again, all the best to you Tommy and all those here! Hope everyone has a great day!

--- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05
* Origin: fsxNet Usenet Gateway (21:1/5)

On Sunday, January 8, 2023 at 8:22:09 AM UTC-8, Irving S wrote:

On Saturday, January 7, 2023 at 10:30:49 PM UTC-5, Tommy wrote:

On Saturday, December 31, 2022 at 8:51:47 AM UTC-8, Irving S wrote:

This is a hard post for me to make, I have been really down the last few weeks. I mean really down, words cannot describe it. I know I have been beyond silly on a few posts and argumentative at times, as others have been too, but this is from the

bottom of my heart and a lot of stuff here is hard to say. Why am I doing this? Not for sympathy, not for attention, but there are a few things I need to say, it is therapeutic for me to say them and maybe something here will inspire you. And I am doing
this across the board with many in my life, some folks important, some not as important. Right now, I have a lot of time on my hands.

I always thought of myself as being invinceable, I think a lot of us do, but I have had some recent health issues that have been beyond scary to me. I have not worked since Thanksgiving week and probably will not return for another month. I am on

disability for the first time in my life. I have been scared and deeply depressed. I have had several panic attacks. If you never had one, well just imagine waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, heart pounding, and you feel like all is
lost and hopeless. Thank goodness my wife was there to calm me down. This is all new to me, not really an anxious or panicky kind of person. I feel better now, no more of these episodes the last few days, they are scary and brutal. I have never been to
so many doctors, and never had so many tests done, this has all been eye opening. I will be ok with time, but in all honesty, have NEVER been so afraid, at some points almost a debilitating afraid.

Being away from work and being idle a lot, I have had time to reflect on a few things. First, I realized my own mortality, and really what a short time we have here. So many people close to us have died recently. Some it was expected, some it was

not. Every day really is a blessing, talking to a friend the other day, he said that "We are all time bombs". That time bomb could be cancer, a stroke, a heart attack, a car wreck, being hit by lightening, it could be anything. You really never know what
is waiting around the corner for any of us. Made me really appreciate every day I can wake up and still be alive and with my faculties intact. I have pondered what awaits us when we are no longer alive. Is there an afterlife, or is that just wishful
thinking? Or is it just nothing, absolutely nothing. Well, none of us know the answer to that, and the more I think about it, the more anxious I get. Because there is no answer. I have realized how fragile our existence is, and the little control we do
have over things.

With all this time to reflect, I realize that I have generally been a good person in this life, but flawed in many ways like all of us. I have generally been kind and caring, but at times not so much. I keep so busy, I mean really busy, it masks a

lot of underlying depression I have, and I have come to grips with it. I had an awful upbringing, and a fair amount of hurt and disappointment in my life, and maybe did not process it as well as I should. I think we all have some degrees of mental health
issues, I am going to deal with them in 2023, with the goal of being more relaxed and kinder to myself, and kinder, more caring, and more empathetic toward others like never before.

I am lucky to be married to an amazing lady. We will be together 29 years next month. I think overall i have been a good spouse, and she has been wonderful helping me navigate these health issues I have had to deal with. The love, kindness, and

support has been amazing. Whatever I need, she is there. I have long taken this woman for granted, and maybe to some extent she has taken me for granted. I feel terrible about this, if I lost her I would be forever lost. It should not take a health
crisis or really any kind of crisis for you to realize the amazing person you are married to, or the amazing friends or significant other you have, you should treat them beyond special every day you wake up. Never take them for granted, being sick I have
had time to reflect on this and am truly ashamed that I have taken others in my life for granted. My message here is I am sure you all have special people in your life. Do not wait for sickness or God forbid tragedy to bring you closer, every day tell
them how much you care for them, how special they are, and make them feel like they are the most important person in the world to you, because they really are.

We have had some rather bitter exchanges here, and for those I am deeply sorry. Especially about politics. I can't tell you how many relationships I have seen destroyed the last few years over politics and Covid. I left Facebook, tired of the

arguments and insults among people that used to get along so well. I have family, maybe some of you do too, that are blood and have tarnished relationships because of politics. What has sunk in with me is that both sides are equally bad. There are a few
truly passionate and honest politicians I am sure, but for the most part they do not report to us, they do not work for us, they work for others in much higher places. We are all just little people, we would like to think we are important, we are not.
And no matter how pursuasive your argument and proof you provide, you are not going to change most people glued to the left or glued to the right. Truth be it, we are probably both wrong, we are all getting screwed no matter what side of the aisle we
identify with. They want us devisive and fighting, and we feed right into it. And what comes of it in the end, except arguments, exchanging insults, broken relationships and even sometimes violence and destruction of property.

I guess my message here is to take a deep breath with the New Year upon us, This is probably the deepest breath I have even taken. Realize what a gift it is to be alive, and what a gift it is to have your health. Not let little things break us

apart, and build relationships and trust instead of doing the opposite. This is a very small community, very small. We are all smart decent people I am sure, although our online behavior does not always reflect it. Giving the fragility of life, given the
fragility really for this world, I hope that this small community can be a better place going forward. I hope that people in this country and others can wake up and stop being so devisive and tribal, we need to get along and work together and love each
other. That is idealistic I know, but more deviseness is the last thing we need. I doubt I will be participating much here going forward, I really need to focus on my physical and mental health and be better than ever to others important in my life.

Please accept my heartfelt wishes to all of you for a great 2023. I truly wish all of you the best. Thanks for listening, a long post, I could not be more sincere and truly wish all of you nothing but joy, happiness, and health as we embark on a

new year.

Hi Irving,

I tried sending you a private email, but your old email address has been deactivated. Send me another email if you want to talk privately.

Tom

I am sorry for that. I seem to have lost your email, if you want to give me an address we can talk privately.

I can tell you that life has not been good for me of late, and I am a very different person that even a few months ago. I needed some surgery almost out of the blue, and had to go through some pre-surgical testing, and other things came out, and it has

just been one thing after another. I have lost 17 lbs in the last month, I am on some medicine that I hate, and my spirits have been beyond bleak. I never thought i would miss work and my co-workers so much. I have lost more than a bounce to my step,
physically and mentally. I really don't want to share any more than that, but it has not been a fun time and I would not wish it on anyone. I am only sharing this because these bad times have facilitated some incredible growth and revellation of some
things for me, and maybe this can help others.

As I mentioned, with so much time on my hands just to sit and ponder, I truly have realized the fragility of our existence. So much sickness and death around me. One of our good friends recently passed after a 2 year bout with pancreatic cancer, we

actually thought she had it beat. My sister in law is in hospice, with pulmonary fibrosis, and my brother in law, is now in a nursing home, he has Parkinson's and cannot stop falling. My best friend developed sepsis, ended up in ICU and vented twice,
almost died. He made it out, thank goodness. Maybe the worst story of all, a former co-worker of my wife is vacuumiing her car at a car wash, a drunk goes off the road and hits her. She is just cleaning her car, minding her own business, and this happens
out of the blue. A miracle, she survived, but many broken bones, surgeries, and months of rehab. You sit back, you see others sick and dying, then you realize it could be you, and wow it is like a ton of bricks. You realize how insignificant most things
we obsess about really are, and how each day is really a blessing. I am not the same person by a long shot. I have no idea how much longer I will walk this earth, but I can tell you all the good in me has come out stronger than ever, and all the bad has
been recognized and I will work harder than ever to be even a better person to family, friends, neighbors, etc.

I will put my chips on the table and honestly say I had some really negative thoughts about myself, but could never carry them out. That is not a solution, and the hurt to others, I could not imagine. I have accepted that good heath is not a guarantee,

but how we process health issues can affect outcomes, so I am now working to be positive. I am lucky to have family and friends that are so supportive. I have come to realize that very sadly, there must be many people out there with hosts of phyiscal and
psychological issues, that are isolated and have no one, no support system at all. how hard that must be. What a world it would be if we took time out of our busy days to help such people. One thing I will do when I am better, there is an assisted living
facility nearby. I bet there are a lot of lonely people there, that could just use a friendly face to chat with, play a game, or enjoy a cup of coffee. I am going to volunteer there, and maybe try to add a bit of joy to someone's day. I can't tell you
how good that would make me feel. It is a shame that it took having issues myself to understand all this, but we get caught up in our lives and stay so busy, we just stay centered on ourselves, that is not necessarily a bad thing, it just is the way it
is.

We come to these forums, we go back and forth, we all try to posture and make ourselves be right and the others wrong, we exchange insults, we act like idiots at times, for what? In the end, these issues are totally unimportant, and all this posturing

is unimportant. It is meaningless. The only thing that matters to me going forward is being a positive person, spreading joy to those important in my life. Being right and coming on top of arguments whether it be on line or in person means nothing in the
end, there are so many better uses of our time. Pride is not a good thing, we work so hard it seems at times to protect our egos. In the end, yes it is meaningless. Take that same energy and just spread good thoughts, and try to comfort those who have
bad thoughts.

Sorry if I rambled on, it is certainly good for me to say all these things, and I have shared these feelings with friends and family. Growth comes from good times, but also from bad times. That is really my message here, . we hope for the best in our

lives, and the same for our friends and loved ones, but sometimes things just don't go the way we hope. Be there for people, really be there. You might think you don't have the time, oh yes you do. Sadly, it could be you in that same place a month from
now, a year from now, a decade from now. If it was not for my support system, I would be in a far darker place than I am now. Really put in perspective what is important, and realize how much time we spend obsessing about trivial things and things we
absolutely cannot control. Focus on what you can control. Try to give 90% to others, and expect 10% back, what a world it would be if we all embraced that. It took some really tough times for me to understand this, but I will endeavor to spend every
remaining breathing day I have living with this concept. Easier said than done, for sure.

Again, all the best to you Tommy and all those here! Hope everyone has a great day!

I am really sorry to hear about your issues and hope for the best. I just got some very bad news: a good friend of mine just died. Sooner or later, all of us will have to face our mortality, and with every passing day it gets to be sooner. I just focus
on what can I do to improve life for my children, grand children and great-grand children. I also focus on what can I do to improve life for others in general. That is why the lion's share of my charitable donations go to educational institutions as this
is the most productive way to help out strangers. Giving them handouts, on the other hand, is a total waste of money. It is the realization of the old adage "give a man a fish and he can eat for a day - TEACH a man to fish and he can eat for a lifetime."

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