Hollywood Fails: The 8 Worst Movies Of 2022
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Hollywood suffered several body blows this year.
Yes, �Top Gun: Maverick� delivered on its hype, and superhero fatigue
evidently hasn�t set in given the gonzo box office for �Black Panther:
Wakanda Forever� and �Thor: Love and Thunder.�
The year�s awards season contenders got pummeled at the box office, though,
and the streaming revolution kept many glued to their couches. So did woke busts like �Strange World� and �Lightyear.�
The year also delivered some classic clunkers, films that made the movie-
going experience a burden. The worst of the worst arrived with plenty of fanfare, but even one of Hollywood�s most intriguing directors couldn�t
prevent it from topping 2022�s worst list.
Nope
Jordan Peele shocked everyone by uncorking 2017�s �Get Out,� a horror film mocking liberal elites in the most delicious way possible. His follow-up, 2019�s �Us,� couldn�t match that debut�s shock value but included smart
scares and thoughtful, Left-leaning commentary.
Peele�s third film finds him abandoning his woke messaging for a tale with an intriguing first act. A mysterious force lurks in the sky, and it�s up to a family of horse trainers, led by Daniel Kaluuya and Keke Palmer, to stop it from crushing their ranch and possibly much more.
The lo-fi effects aren�t the problem here. Palmer�s character is irritating
to the core, while Kaluuya has trouble staying awake on screen. We know the feeling. The finale is a dud for the ages, blending head-scratching character choices and dread-free confrontations.
Suddenly Peele�s directorial promise has a decided M. Night Shyamalan vibe.
Did Peele peak with his first major hit like Shyamalan did with �The Sixth Sense?�
Marry Me
Rom-coms are currently on life support thanks to absurd plot gimmicks and a fear of old-school romance. This 2022 debacle helps explain the genre�s sorry state of affairs.
Jennifer Lopez plays a pop princess prepping to marry her pop prince during a sold-out show. She learns, mid-performance, he�s been cheating on her. She decides to select a random dude out of the audience (Owen Wilson, who should have known better than to take this gig) to marry instead.
Yes, that�s the actual plot of the film. Really. Suffice to say, matters
don�t improve from there.
Clerks III
Remember when it was cool to watch movie nerds debate �Star Wars� lore on the big screen? Kevin Smith�s 1994 indie smash �Clerks� ran with that theme, but every third YouTube channel now provides that service.
That left Smith scrambling for both relevance and a reason to reunite his old �Clerks� crew one more time. He found neither in this cinematic stink bomb.
Forever clerks Randal and Dante (Jeff Anderson, Brian O�Halloran) shoot a
movie about their days behind the counter after Randal recovers from a near- fatal heart attack. The jokes are few, the sentimentality would embarrass a Hallmark movie buff, and the sequel smells like a misguided attempt to revive Smith�s glory days.
The Lair
Director Neil Marshall delivered one of the best monster movies in recent memory with 2005�s �The Descent.� The Brit has been working steadily ever since, never coming close to that modern classic in the process. Think �Hellboy,� �Centurion,� �Doomsday,� and �The Reckoning.�
�The Lair� marks a low point not just for Marshall but for the horror genre.
A Mary Sue-style heroine (Charlotte Kirk) battles nasty creatures who have staked out a base in modern-day Afghanistan.
Now, Kirk�s character and a rogue�s gallery of forgettable soldiers must
subdue both the monsters and atrocious, even by B-movie standards, dialogue.
The only positive note about �The Lair?� No socio-political lecturing between the dumb action scenes and dumber monster battles.
Me Time
Kevin Hart needs a heart-to-heart chat with his agent. He�s one of the industry�s most likable talents, but he routinely chooses projects beneath those talents. Fellow critics threw his other Netflix original, �The Man from Toronto,� under the bus, too.
�Me Time� offers an example of his terrible decisions. He�s cast as an emasculated dad who reunites with his buddy (Mark Wahlberg) for some extreme adventures. Laughs? Forget about it. This strained affair offers a sly
premise but never becomes the rip-roaring buddy comedy it wants to be.
The Munsters
This Netflix original proves writer/director Rob Zombie loves the classic
�60s sitcom as much as we do. So why did he update its gimmick in such
slipshod fashion?
It�s not a casting issue. Sheri Moon Zombie, the director�s wife/muse, oozes sweetness as Lily Munster, while Jeff Daniel Phillips nails Herman�s cornball shtick.
The film�s aesthetic � cheap neon hues and cut-rate production design � only hints at the debacle in motion. Prepare to sit, stone-faced, as the hard- working stars scramble to replicate the source material�s deft touch.
They/Them
The horror film�s title is darn near brilliant (it�s pronounced �They � Slash
� Them�). Everything else about the Peacock thriller is a train wreck.
The uber-woke story follows LGBTQ+ campers dropped off at a deprogramming
camp run by Kevin Bacon. So why is Bacon�s character so kind, so tolerant? Is it an act, or are there other threats lurking on the camp grounds?
You won�t care. The film�s progressive bona fides are off the charts, but audiences have little tolerance for a film lacking tension, horror-style
kills, or other genre necessities. It�s a bore, something no horror film
should be.
Run Sweetheart Run
The 2019 comedy �Booksmart� set the standard for super-woke movie making.
�Run Sweetheart Run� begs to differ.
This brain-dead thriller follows a woman (Ella Balinska) who goes on a, �it�s not a date, but what is it?� business meeting with a client. Before the night ends she�s on the run, said client hot on her trail.
What follows is a clumsy pastiche of feminism gone wild, victimhood on steroids, and other progressive platitudes. How woke is it? Even The New York Times called foul on the film. �We get it: The male villain is a stand-in for the patriarchy, and for women, it�s an uphill battle just to survive. No need to bludgeon us over the head with it.�
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Let's go Brandon!
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