XPost: rec.arts.tv
In article <tva04h$3jf7m$
[email protected]>,
[email protected] wrote:
After suffering a disaster, the remaining crew of spaceship
Ark One must band together to survive.
Was this a rejected CW show? It was terrible!
I meant to write something more comprehesive but lost my notes or forgot. >Here's some random thoughts and my chat with anim8rfsk while I watched.
All the adults died, leaving the young adults in charge. How convenient. BTW, >who designed this ship to place everyone in rotating chmabers on the outside >of ship instead of the interior of the shaft portion, where they would be >protected from space debris. Who puts all the mission critical people >together, and why did there seem to be no chain of command or protocalls?
I am not going to comment on muscle atrophy or the gravity being all wrong.
I immediately noticed the stars zooming by in the windows. Ugh. I am sure the >stars outside would chnage position, but that's ridiculous!
A female lieutenant takes control and tells everyone they're a year away from >their destination and only have a month's worth of food that was intended for >consumption at their destination. Once again, who planned this voyage? Why >don't they put people back into hibernation?
A cute horticulturalist prodigy tells the girl in charge that he managed to >smuggle a big crate of super-dirt onto the Ark, in case their destination is >barren. Shouldn't he know that hydroponics is much more efficient and how he >plans on using that super-dirt to grow crops on a barren planet? Once again, >who planned this voyage?
For some stupid reason, their life support system warns you about leaks when >there's less than 20% of air left instead of immediately when it detects the >leak so the bulkheads aren't dropping while you're trying to fix them. As >soon as I saw the life support systems expert, I knew he was doomed as doomed >can be because he's older than everyone else. It turns out he stowed aboard >by replacing the real life support systems expert, instead of the guy who is >in charge of changing air filters and wouldn't be noticed. Hey, he said the >title of this ep!
Two of the crew exposition that they were forbidden to be on the ship because >they're lovers, so they lied about it. Why is it forbidden? Do they expect >people to have bastard babies or something? How did they hide it? Oh yeah, >why is she wearing a babushka?
For dramatic reasons, the only way to fix the life support was via spacewalk. >Making matters worse, no one was tethered and there were no ladders on the >exterior to hold onto. I hope those jetpacks don't malfunction or experience >operator error!
Meanwhile, a blond entitled bitch decides she's going to break water curfew >and take a shower in a deserted part of the ship. Why did they put police >crime scene tape over the door instead of locking it and why didn't they turn >off the water to the showers? Before she can take her secret non-naked >shower, she gets busted by a man who had been waiting until she was turning >on the water. Why was he loitering in the women's showers and why did he let >her get dressed instead of frog-marching her naked to the bridge as a lesson? >I can only assume the lingering shot of the water dripping from the not- >quite-off shower is going to cause a water shortage in the future.
Oh yeah, the boss girl killed the elder impersonator after he blabbed about >knowing her secret. Yeah, who didn't see that one coming?
Watching people fail miserably trying to input passcodes during an emergency will never grow old. God forbid there be a retinal or thumbprint option as well.
Baldy McStoicPants has the competence and gravitas one appreciates in a Head
of Security and not only manages to get the door unlocked, but returns with a helmet for the person directing the evacuation. Lt. Pissy whined about waking up the captain after an ENTIRE CRYO BAY disintegrated. I think she's gonna wanna know, buddy.
"My god, man, did you pay no attention in orientation?" Have you MET these people, doc?
Aaand we start the "piss off, that's not my job" counter at 3 so far. Lt
Pissy, Lt. HotScot and now Imposter.
WHAT is with the kerchief on Babushka, ffs? Was the accent not thick enough to scream East European? Or the outright declaration of nationality?
Chatty McTwitchy, SHUT UP. You give me a headache every time you open your mouth. Farmer Angus is adorable.
You know, if I were an Impostor, I would try to lie low and not antagonize everyone I talked to.
And again McStoic steps up to the plate and showerblocks Karen TitsOut. I thought the drip of water from the shower head as they left might become Chekov's Leak, but nothing came of it.
I like Lt Red putting Lt Pissy in his place in the farm - she's right; he had
a decent point but made an ass of himself grandstanding. He's That Guy in a meeting that makes up stuff to complain about but never offers solutions, just more blockers.
Trent MommyIssues is a canary in a space coal mine. Sensors haven't detected the reduced O2 level yet, but his sensitive lungs can. Why has THE ENTIRE SHIP lost oxygen? That's not a leak, that's explosive decompression in every section. How many hours were they in a sealed room that they could have used
up allllll the oxygen?
Do I advance the Not My Job counter if it's Impostor again?
Aw, McStoic's first slip-up, losing a prisoner.
BSG Memorial Personnel Count: 142
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